Thriving New Mama

Even those you think are made from societal pressure, circumstance, or ignorance. I know, that sounds kind of scary and overwhelming.

I’ve a personal story.

When my child turned 6 months and I was due back at work, I decided to place my child with my mother. Mothers, they can be strong convictions about how to raise a child. It’s also tough to argue with them because after all, they raised you.

So, my mother believed in using the walker, in feeding instead of doing baby-led weaning (because she doesn’t enjoy the mess and to be fair, who does?) and in sleeping tummy down (cue APA’s finger wagging).

I’m thankful that she was onboard with the cloth diapering and some semblance of a Montessori environment.

Do you every think, “I’ve no choice because I’m not the one actually caring for my child in the daytime?” I did.

I wanted to delay enrolling her into preschool. So, even with some disagreements and hardly asserting my stand in front of my mother, I delayed the preschool enrollment until she was 16 months.

And my sister told me point-blank, “You’re the parent. Whether she’s in childcare or with mom, it’s your decision. In choosing that, you are also choosing the kind of early years’ experience she has. You always have a choice.”

“You’re the parent. You get to choose. You always have a choice.”

That hit me quite hard. They have also become sort of mantras for me.

I learned to take ownership of my decisions, including my parenting ones. It was scary and overwhelming, and it was also empowering. Because if you can decide one way, you can also decide the other.

Both ways have consequences. Now, you know you can choose the consequences.

You’re going to parent uniquely because you’re unique.